Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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