dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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