Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!

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  (248): Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy! http://tfl.nu/x7i6
  Replies (4) Good night (2042) Bad night (1152)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.

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  (734): Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics. http://tfl.nu/seve
  Replies (1) Good night (793) Bad night (1223)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.

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  (727): I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut. http://tfl.nu/wfck
  Replies (126) Good night (1403) Bad night (3802)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready

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  (716): An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready http://tfl.nu/od5a
  Replies (21) Good night (4390) Bad night (1219)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.

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  (484): I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting. http://tfl.nu/ejol
  Replies (15) Good night (5868) Bad night (1443)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.

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  (706): I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable. http://tfl.nu/ug12
  Replies (3) Good night (1333) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.

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  (541): It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker. http://tfl.nu/udye
  Replies (2) Good night (1262) Bad night (468)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?

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  (603): Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener? http://tfl.nu/3402
  Replies (3) Good night (1303) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM

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  (336): Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM http://tfl.nu/7din
  Replies (9) Good night (1813) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite

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  (949): Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite http://tfl.nu/rl1y
  Replies (7) Good night (654) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.

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  (646): We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman. http://tfl.nu/a2vv
  Replies (8) Good night (576) Bad night (242)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.

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  (412): he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love. http://tfl.nu/yxe9
  Replies (2) Good night (705) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  $1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place

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  (602): $1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place http://tfl.nu/ekdp
  Replies (1) Good night (489) Bad night (214)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.

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  (615): It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes. http://tfl.nu/hojz
  Replies (5) Good night (796) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.

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  (781): I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life. http://tfl.nu/cjom
  Replies (1) Good night (404) Bad night (251)

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