D3 body, D1 cock
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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