i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
