drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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