Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
