He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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