six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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