Christians are straight up FREAKS
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
