Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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