I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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