So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer