I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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