I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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