More tranny stories later!
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
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