ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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