So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
