I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
