weddingsv make me drug and hornr
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Let's paint friendship bongs
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize