He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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