you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
