don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
