you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize