i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize