but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
