By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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