I want to walk on stilts...naked
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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