I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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