this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize