Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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