you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
