she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize