i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
