btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
