sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
