Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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