So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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