Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
