i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
