I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
