Actions speak louder than pants.
I just found puke in my bra..
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize