she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
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