I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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