Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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