Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize