Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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