I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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