Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS