maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have already put on my inside pants.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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