D3 body, D1 cock
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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